three cheers for Karamozov
i just took a snooze right here at my desk while reading over my last post GEEZ it was boring. Funny now, too, since I went home and came back and nothing was like I thought it would be. 1st-most meiguo highlight was olivia+megan+mandie reunion in DC. i feel like a different self with them and sorry i don't know what that means. 2nd-most highlight was the ambien i took on the plane on the way from beijing to knock myself out. i took it about 5 min before boarding the plane. found my seat, put my backpack in the overhead compartment, fastened my safety belt, and then i started tripping balls. all i can remember is staring at the pillow that had fallen to the floor underneath the seat in front of me because it was moving all around and changing shape. people were filling in the seats all around me but i was in a bubble, couldn't hear anything they were saying and they all looked really weird, like bodies with heads that were just skulls and really heavy-set Australopithecus robustus jaws. i closed my eyes after take-off, slept for about 1.5 hours, then eyes popped open wide awake right after the food cart went by. i know i stumbled back to the service station where the flight attendants work and somehow communicated that i needed some food. then i was awake for the entire rest of the flight. the experience was out of the ordinary which is why i put it atop my highlights list, but honestly i think hallucination is a state of mind more easily enjoyed when it is intentional or at least anticipated. not that this was unpleasant, because i knew why it was happening- now i see why you should never operate heavy machinery after popping an ambien.
if that was #2, then how pathetic the rest of my trip must have been, right? well, yeah, maybe. when you go back home, and when your home is where all of your friends (high school + college) used to be and there's not a single one left, things look pretty bleak. i headed over the ming garden, where i worked for a long time, and saw a few of the folks i used to work with, and for a few minutes was actually thinking about just quitting the CDC and coming back to work at Ming's for the rest of my life, but then they told me they were selling the place within the week. so, out of luck. i spent all the money i had saved on sweaters, mainly, and my mom and i fought about that because she's right, i live beyond my means. not that i have debt or anything- i won't spend money i don't have- it's just that i dont know how to effectively manage money. i'm bad with money. if i have money, i spend it, if i dont, i dont. well, so i guess i could say that i am halfway good with money. i liken myself to Alexei Karamozov, who also didn't know the value of money-sometime he would get his allowance and spend it all right away on something silly, or he would hold onto it for weeks and not know what to do with it. but more and more it seems that while this quality is attractive to me as a characteristic of a very romantic fictional character in my favorite book , i would probably not appreciate, for example, having a husband who handled his money the way that i do. so i should work on that lest i become the crazy broke alone shopping cat lady 20 years from now.
amanda, bill, and i started watching Lost this weekend...now amanda and i have watched the whole first season, i think, and are both suffering from nightmares every time we go to sleep! although i have a certain fondness for dinosaurs, i hope that the big thing that runs through the woods and mangles people but doesn't eat them and is huge and chases people but has never once been seen does not turn out to be a T. rex. Because I was saying that remember the movie/book It? It had the creepy clown who would appear and disappear, i dont remember what It did to people exactly, but in the end It turned out that the evil force behind the homicidal clown was actually just a gigantic spider. don't get me wrong, i HATE spiders, but that ending was laaaaame. A big spider is not scary in the same nightmarish supernatural beyond-this-world purely EVIL way that that magical clown was, know what I mean? I'm trying to think of what kind of resolution this season could have that i would be satisfied with, and i'm not sure. if other humans on the island were involved, that could be scary, esp if they've gone nuts after living on the island for so long, like the french lady. i considered aliens, too, but that would have to be delicately done. meh, we'll see, but a dinosaur- that would be way to obvious since we already heard the T. rex-sounding shreeking (sp?) and thought, hm, sounds like a dinosaur.
it's cold in the office today. nothing to do this morning really except update blog and think about what i'm going to eat today...
if that was #2, then how pathetic the rest of my trip must have been, right? well, yeah, maybe. when you go back home, and when your home is where all of your friends (high school + college) used to be and there's not a single one left, things look pretty bleak. i headed over the ming garden, where i worked for a long time, and saw a few of the folks i used to work with, and for a few minutes was actually thinking about just quitting the CDC and coming back to work at Ming's for the rest of my life, but then they told me they were selling the place within the week. so, out of luck. i spent all the money i had saved on sweaters, mainly, and my mom and i fought about that because she's right, i live beyond my means. not that i have debt or anything- i won't spend money i don't have- it's just that i dont know how to effectively manage money. i'm bad with money. if i have money, i spend it, if i dont, i dont. well, so i guess i could say that i am halfway good with money. i liken myself to Alexei Karamozov, who also didn't know the value of money-sometime he would get his allowance and spend it all right away on something silly, or he would hold onto it for weeks and not know what to do with it. but more and more it seems that while this quality is attractive to me as a characteristic of a very romantic fictional character in my favorite book , i would probably not appreciate, for example, having a husband who handled his money the way that i do. so i should work on that lest i become the crazy broke alone shopping cat lady 20 years from now.
amanda, bill, and i started watching Lost this weekend...now amanda and i have watched the whole first season, i think, and are both suffering from nightmares every time we go to sleep! although i have a certain fondness for dinosaurs, i hope that the big thing that runs through the woods and mangles people but doesn't eat them and is huge and chases people but has never once been seen does not turn out to be a T. rex. Because I was saying that remember the movie/book It? It had the creepy clown who would appear and disappear, i dont remember what It did to people exactly, but in the end It turned out that the evil force behind the homicidal clown was actually just a gigantic spider. don't get me wrong, i HATE spiders, but that ending was laaaaame. A big spider is not scary in the same nightmarish supernatural beyond-this-world purely EVIL way that that magical clown was, know what I mean? I'm trying to think of what kind of resolution this season could have that i would be satisfied with, and i'm not sure. if other humans on the island were involved, that could be scary, esp if they've gone nuts after living on the island for so long, like the french lady. i considered aliens, too, but that would have to be delicately done. meh, we'll see, but a dinosaur- that would be way to obvious since we already heard the T. rex-sounding shreeking (sp?) and thought, hm, sounds like a dinosaur.
it's cold in the office today. nothing to do this morning really except update blog and think about what i'm going to eat today...
posted by Mandie at 9:55 AM
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